Written by Hobie Wolff
We learned about guns in 10th grade world history
We learned about how they revolutionized war
We learned that after 1914
War would never look the same again
Maybe war could mean something new
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I always wondered how news outlets got their stories so fast
That only 5 minutes after something happened, every seemed to know already
That only ten minutes after something happened, they already had a catchy headline
I wondered if they had someone waiting for the sound of a siren
Ready to chase those flashing lights to the next story
Ready to boil everything down into one or two sentences
It seems unimaginable to have your life reduced to a headline
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I never thought I could lose you until 100 shots went off in the next room
100 shots shattering doors and glass with 100 instagram stories filled with prayers
I never thought I could lose you until I got a text saying you were ok
--
Who knew that lesson never stopped that we’d continue to learn about guns all through high school
That we’d learn 3 bullets can kill someone our age
That we’d learn what blood looks like spilled across the floor and that we could keep running
Who knew we’d learn fear would make us keep running
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Maybe war looks like a highschool
With 3 metal detectors, security guards
And students running to get out of it
Maybe war looks like freshman wondering if their friend is alive
Maybe war looks like a gym teacher who won’t get to teach tomorrow
Maybe war, today, is all around us
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I remember the first time I had to do a lockdown drill
I was in preschool
In pigtails with bangs straight across my face I asked my teacher
“Why are we hiding under the desks? What are we hiding from?”
She told me we were hiding in case a dog got into the building
I was 15 when I realized:
We were preparing for an active shooter
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Since 2018 there have been been 132 school shootings
121 people have been injured in this year
34 people have been killed
A modern rifle carries an average of 30 rounds
Only 29% of Americans have never shot a gun before
28 children have been killed in school shooting this year
24 states have had a school shooting occur in the past year
The standard handgun carries 17 rounds
And the average american owns 5 guns
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We used to be statistics
It seemed further away when it was numbers on a page
How could it be us
When it was a face we’d never seen before
How could it be us?
When it happened a state over
I never thought it could be us until 100 shots went off in the next room
--
“What are we hiding from”
I asked
Cause I don’t think we’re hiding from dogs anymore
--
Maybe war is all around us today
Maybe war is becoming a statistic
Maybe war is 100 shots going off next to a room of people who never thought it would be them
Maybe war is realizing, maybe all along you were hiding from animals, just not the ones you thought
Maybe war is thinking we should still be hiding
And maybe, that lesson never ends
Maybe everyday we’re still learning what a gun can really do